Meditation Blog Archives - Just Be Bodyworks

The when, where, why & WTF of explicit meditation.

I was honestly on the fence about offering this event. How might it be received? Everyone’s going to know that I’m a potty mouth! Etc. etc. But I finally decided that I was just going to do it. F*** it, right!?

What is explicit guided mediation? Weaving profanities into my meditation language: saying things like “let that sh** go” or “calm the f*** down” or any of that stronger “taboo” language.

If you’re thinking, “Say no more! Sign me up!!” Great! Click this lil button and lets go!

SIGN ME UP!!!

If you still have questions…read on. I promise it gets good.

Now, this is obviously not language that I use regularly with my clients. Part of my hesitation in offering this event was in how it may be received by my more modest clientele. But bear with me. This is a special event and there are a few personal reasons why I wanted to offer this.

You may be wondering why I’m suggesting that you come meditate to profane language? It turns out science wants you to. The brain links obscenities with emotion. When you are able to express your emotions, you are able to cope with them better, relieve stress and even reduce pain.

Even if you don’t consider yourself a “potty mouth” in your daily use of language, when was the last time you swore, even just in your own head. Maybe you stubbed your toe, maybe you realized you forgot something important, maybe someone really just p*ssed you off. A silent mental “sh**” or even a “f***” under your breath was the gentle therapy you offered your brain to cope with pain, stress and disappointment.

Language has power. Plain and simple. The words that we say to ourselves and to the world express our own inner reality and validate our emotions. Sometimes a “no” feels even more powerful with a “f*ck” behind it. “F*ck no!”

EMOTIONAL RELEASE

The use of strong language triggers emotional centers in your brain so that you are able to express what you’re feeling with more clarity, at least that’s how your brain perceives it. You obviously still express what you’re feeling without using strong language. But when you do use strong language it really ignites that emotional center of your brain and adds an extra layer of transparency & authenticity to your expression.

The more that we release our emotions, the less impact they have on us. One of the greatest ways in which to release them is to communicate them. With that communication, the more likely we are able to instigate a change in the situation around us. Everything really distills down to communication & expressing yourself; both things that help immensely with stress management. The more that you hold it in and bite your tongue and refuse to speak your truth the more that stress builds up.

I want you to stop biting your tongue!!!

Now, this doesn’t mean that you should run around town screaming expletives at everyone that’s p*ssed you off! However, you can use this language in a therapeutic & intentional way. We talk a lot about having intention in what we say or being impeccable with your word.

Running around dropping F-bombs all over the place is not necessarily the most intentional use of language nor the most beneficial. To use expletive language in an intentional way such as in meditation can truly help your brain to release some of that built up stress.

PAIN MANAGEMENT

A study in the UK actually found that using strong language triggers a pain inhibitor. The theory here was that it actually activated the emotional center of the brain to trigger a fight or flight response. Now usually when we are talking about stress-management, the fight or flight brain space is something that we try to avoid. But again, when used in an intentional way and towards the benefit of pain management, triggering that fight or flight response can be beneficial.

In this study subjects immersed their hand in ice water. The intense cold mimics pain in the body. A study group was asked to used expletive language while the control group was asked to use expressive but “clean” language. They found that the group that was utilizing the stronger language was able to withstand the pain and keep their hand submerged in the ice water quite a bit longer than the control group that wasn’t using “taboo” language.

CREATIVE OUTLET

It has been found that using strong language activates the right side of the brain, which is the more creative side of the brain. This is interesting because language processing, in general, is usually done in the left side of the brain which is the more logical analytical side of the brain. It takes some creativity to figure out precisely where in your sentence or expression you would like to insert this word, which in itself doesn’t necessarily have context to what you’re saying but puts some power & ‘oomph’ behind it.

Whether you’re using it for good or for bad, colorful language does activate that creative side of the brain. You get the benefit of creation similar to painting, singing or dancing. Because we live so often in the left logical analytical side of the brain in day to day adulting, anything that activates the other more creative side is going to help in balancing things out and ultimately reduces stress. Anything that you are able to do that is creative can be a huge part of your self-care. If all that you end up having time for painting some colorful creative sentences, then let’s take it where we can get it.

*Sometimes a “no” feels even more final with a “f*ck” behind it.*

A NEW TWIST ON MEDITATION

This special meditation event allows for the opportunity to check out another side of guided meditation. A little less woo-woo than your traditional meditation group. My regular guided meditation group are already incredibly laid back, casual and low expectation. No lotus position or hand mudras required. Come as you are.

But if you’re craving something even more approachable, the explicit guided meditation groups are an opportunity to get the benefits of meditation in a format that is COMPLETLEY casual, mellow and all about relaxing and chilling the F out. This gives you a fun new format & vibe to warm up to meditation with, as well and the added benefits of using explicit language.

So! I offered up my very first Let That Sh*t Go – Explicit Guided Meditation 2 days before my 30^th Birthday in the summer of 2019. My own little rebellious way of celebrating. This and future explicit meditation groups are offered in the evening and have by far been our most popular class, second only to our Partners Massage Classes. When offered in person at the studio, Explicit Meditation includes a complimentary beer, wine or cider in the spirit of not giving a f*ck and quite often sells out quick. When offered online you are welcomed and encouraged to grab libation of your choice and get cozy with some headphones.

This is honestly a risky endeavor as a business owner, but has become so near and dear to my heart and to the hearts of a select niche of clientele. While there is nothing in it other than the pure intention to offer up an alternative form of stress management, the mode by which I’m offering it is a bit taboo. Maybe you read this post and find yourself offended at the censored language within; astonished at my audacity. Maybe you read it and thought “FINALLY! This is exactly what I need!” and realize that I am even more ‘your people’ than you originally thought.

So, take or leave it.

JOIN IN AN UPCOMING EXPLICIT MEDITATION

So, you are cordially invited to join me for this one of a kind adult only (21+) guided meditation group. Enjoy the benefits of traditional meditation along with the added bonus of transparency, honesty and expletives to work through how we’re really f*cking feeling.

*Please note that all in-studio offerings are pending current Covid regulations at any given time. Please be sure to double check whether you are registering for a virtual or in-studio meditation and if it is a “Let That Sh*t Go Explicit Guided Meditation” or our regular guided meditation which is “Just Be Calm Guided Meditation”. As of 4/1/2021 we do not currently have any in-studio meditations scheduled.

CHECK UPCOMING MEDITATION DATES

If this is right up your alley, you can learn more about it in this video.

If this is so not your scene, then disregard and join me for my more wholesome offerings in the future.

You see I’m in my 30’s now so maybe I’m feeling a little burst of rebelliousness as I leave my 20’s behind me.

Or maybe, I’m just done giving a f*ck.

Kids who are just beginning to learn to manage their internal stuff benefit magnificently by being given some instruction rather than having to stumble through it on their own. Most adults I know (raises hand) wish that they had been given more guidance in this department when they were young.

The Just Be Calm Kids Mindfulness & Meditation Workshops are designed not only to teach children the skills needed to develop self-regulation but to provide parents the framework needed to support these skills.

Self-Regualtion & Self Awareness

Meditation & mindfulness teaches kids to connect with themselves. When they aren’t empathic, when they aren’t kind to others or in their community, it’s usually because they aren’t connected to themselves.

If you learn to be more aware of your thought processes and reactions in the present moment, it follows that you would be more in charge of your emotions and behaviors. Kids that are really impulsive, need help to learn to create some distance between stimuli & reaction. Meditation helps to bring about this mindfulness, but it is a skill that is learned over time.

Self-Esteem & Confidence

Most of the insecurities people have as adults can be traced back to their childhoods.

The self awareness brought about by meditation can bolster a childs feelings of security, empathy and inner stability, and this, in turn, builds compassion, joy and self-esteem.

Mindfulness for children helps kids gain self-awareness and become more confident which develops naturally when kids learn from their meditation practice that they don’t have to react to all of their thoughts and emotions – they can choose which ones are worthy of their attention and response.

Confident kids are better equipped to deal with unfamiliar situations and with this adaptability, become better problem solvers and develop a deeper appreciation of life.

Self acceptance, emotional regulation, learning how to quiet one’s mind—these are invaluable skills. Meditation teaches kids that they are enough, that right now is enough.

Social & Emotional Development

Meditation seems to help to inspire kindness, compassion & empathy. Most undesirable behaviors that we see from kids, are lacking these components. Guided visualization meditation can help to teach the skills necessary for taking on different perspectives. The ability to see things from another’s point of view begins to shift a childs thinking from “me” to “we.”

Meditation & mindfulness activities help kids to build the skills needed for responsible decision making & prosocial behaviors as well as having a stronger sense of self and are more connected to and respectful of those around them.

Share You Calm Rather Than Join Their Chaos

If we begin to look at every meltdown or tantrum as a learning opportunity we can show children the contrast of results in the moment rather than simply in theory. Setting children up for creating their own success and self-accountability, rather than being their external regulator, ultimately nurtures emotional intelligence. In the same way that they will not learn math if we do their homework for them, they will not learn self-regulation if we are always regulating them.

The key to learning self-regulation skills is not to avoid situations that are difficult for kids to handle, but to guide kids through them and provide a supportive framework or “scaffolding” until they can handle these challenges on their own. Providing a blueprint and breaking the chain into small steps allows for the building self-regulation skills in manageable increments.

You put together a scaffolding fame work one level at a time. Introduce one skill and give them time to master it before introducing the next. Slowly challenging them to stretch beyond their current capability but at the same time keeping expectations realistic to ensure success.

When we as adults approach impulsive, inappropriate behavior calmly, give them guidance and time to reflect, kids can learn to choose better ways to respond to that situation. Non-judgmental and non-emotional feedback gives them the opportunity to learn: what went wrong, and why, and how they can fix it next time.

When kids are part of a reflective and analytical environment rather than one that’s emotional and fast-paced they can learn to make better choices. Slowing down allows children to become more thoughtful, reflective and self-aware.

Actionable Advice

These are easy concepts in theory but how do we actually put them into practice? Join us for the Just Be Calm Kids Mindfulness & Mediation Workshops where children (and parents) will learn in age appropriate groups the skills needed to develop & nurture self-regulation, emotional intelligence & healthy coping through guided meditation, reflective conversation, artistic expression, journaling exercises and various engagement activities.